boy1: Wait someone took a dump in the urinal?
boy2: That's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard.
me: You obviously haven't heard a good dead baby joke.
boy2: Oh? Try me.
me: What's the difference between a dead baby and a sandwich?
boy2: I don't know, what?
me: I don't fuck a sandwich before I eat it.
boy2: Okay, that's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard.
me: I know.
In my next life I want to live backwards. You start out dead and get that out of...– Woody Allen (via elume) (via usefulguilt)
dead baby jokes